Combat Zone

ARIES – You’re getting a lot of flac this month for things you had nothing to do with. Your shoes getting dirt all over the carpet? Your ‘violent outburst’ disrupting class? Your foot going through that glass door? You can’t control everything, Aries. Leave “your” problems for someone else to deal with.   TAURUS – A sweet taste in your mouth in the middle of the month will trigger a memory from long ago. It all comes rushing back–the abandoned Jell-O factory, the enormous vat of bubbling… Oh god, your...

Puget Sound students are lonely. Spring is in the air and, as trees begin to blossom and birds begin to chirp, Loggers begin to weep at their broken and toxic social lives. Who can save them? In desperation they turn to Hey You’s and LikeALittle, only to suffer failures in communication and more emptiness. Our new feature, Bachelor of the Week, is here as yet another ineffective attempt to help you find what you are looking for—or better yet, what you aren’t. CZ: Congratulations on being our first bachelor! Now...