Oedipus Tex, Author at The Trail

Rival watch: PLU welcomes Tonald Rhombus as new president

Oedipus TexApril 29, 2011

Crosstown rivals: New PLU president Tonald Rhombus (above) eagerly jots down the beginnings of his ‘master plan’ to sabotage the University of Puget Sound. Rhombus regularly orders Psych Megawa (below), the Dean of Students, to prank-call Puget Sound and make cruel, hurtful jokes. Right before he hangs up he always yells, “psych!”.

Combat Zone

In a move to go green, Cupid switches from arrows to “bitch slaps”

Oedipus TexFebruary 18, 2011

As the costs and hazards of arrow production continue to climb, few...

Combat Zone Highlights

Arsenic microbe prefers Cheetos, beer

Oedipus TexDecember 10, 2010

When asked what he ate before Cheetos were invented, the microbe replied: “I think of the day Cheetos were invented as the day I was truly born. They are dangerously cheesy.” He sounded drunk.

Combat Zone

Democrats aim to replace gay ban with gay band

Oedipus TexSeptember 22, 2010

After Senate Republicans on Tuesday blocked the legislation that would have repealed the “don’t ask, don’t tell” law in the military, Democrats are now scrambling to introduce a new bill which they hope will be met with greater success. “The idea of lifting the gay ban was unpopular with the GOP,” senate majority leader Harry Reid, D-Nev., said, “but that’s only because it would allow gays to openly join the military armed forces. What we are proposing now is that we repeal the ban, but take all gays and put...