We’re no state school, but here at the Puge I would say we study hard but also make time to get our party on.
There are many different parties that take place on weekends that can be really great to dance off some steam, mack on some hottie or even find someone to take home with you.
But this can be complicated. Drunkenness can blur the lines of good and bad decisions. Plus, the pressure of doing what one perceives one “should” be doing to live college life to the fullest can result in bad situations.
That said, you can be smart and empowered when it comes to partying.
Let’s start with drinking. Count your drinks (marks on your arm is classic) and know your limits. Obviously, don’t drink something a stranger makes you. This is all pretty basic stuff.
There’s also the element where, if you get too drunk, you may get sloppy or your performance in bed may change. Know yourself. I think it’s really admirable when, for example, a guy will know he gets so-called “whiskey dick” and then drinks less if he knows a reliable boner will be useful later.
One of my best friends once said she has “whiskey clit” where it is too dry down there to get aroused. In this case (and just in general), use lube.
Washington law states that if either party in a sexual situation is intoxicated, consent is voided. While I think that saying you should never hook up drunk is a little extreme, be a decent human being. It’s not cool to hook up with someone way drunker than you because you might be taking advantage of their altered state.
Now, when alcohol is mixed with partying, inhibitions can fly out of the foggy, sweat-condensed windows.
There are a number of things people do at parties that some consider “trashy” or “slutty.” This labeling drives me nuts: we need to get over this cutting down of people that are acting in a way we either don’t agree with or, more likely, in a way we wish we were brave enough to act like.
Like the DFMO: dance floor make out. I’m guilty of this and you know what? It was awesome. Sometimes the passion strikes and you don’t necessarily want to remove yourself from the ambiance of the party.
I say, do what you do. It can be fun. It’s also not “slutty” to make out with several people at a party, but it’s probably not respectful to the sloppy firsts/seconds/thirds if they’re still around.
Sometimes things get even more heated… and handsy. In the spirit of full disclosure, I have received manual stimulation on a dance floor. While I’m not embarrassed about it, I can’t say I condone it because it would have been awful to get caught and it’s kind of unsanitary.
For the most part, having things get hot and heated is best done in the privacy of one’s home. That way, if both of you adults consent, things can go all the way if need be and you won’t have to relocate all in the mood.
It also has to be said that if you dance or make out with someone on the dance floor, you are not chained to that person all night. Most importantly, you should not feel an expectation that because you paid them attention, you are nonverbally agreeing to way more.
In the immortal words of Flight of the Conchords, a kiss is not a contract. Be excellent to each other and party on, dudes.
