Whether in a relationship or hook-up situation, single or anywhere in between, everyone has access to a sexual goldmine. Participating in this act is free, cheap (no condoms even) and probably one of the best things you can do to be great in the sack. That wonderful act is none other than masturbation.
Masturbating is one of those words, like “vagina” or “moist,” that makes a lot of people cringe. The word is pretty displeasing on the tongue, but the benefits of doin’ it far outweigh the stigmatization some people associate with it.
There should be a greater movement for masturbation to be a cornerstone of sexual liberation, especially in a time of STD and teen pregnancy panic. One has a 0% chance of pregnancy or STDs and comfort with one’s own body and sexuality does wonders for one’s partner sex life.
Plus, doin’ it is good for you! One can get a lot of the same benefits as from partner sex by masturbating, thanks to the big O: orgasm.
The first benefit to orgasm is pretty well known: stress and tension relief. The increased heart rate, blood flow and muscle tautness are said to converge to a relaxed state afterward. Aah. It’s like yoga, but free.
Who could not use a little of that in the often grueling academic atmosphere?
Not only does it release stress, the (pseudo-)post-coital bliss following the rush of endorphins one gets during orgasm has a natural tranquilizing effect, which can help lull one to sleep (although admittedly there is an occasional night here and there I get too riled up and sleep is more elusive).
These same endorphins also increase one’s pain tolerance by up to 70 percent, as cited in Live Strong Online. Thus, whenever a female friend mentions menstrual cramps or pain, I without fail will advise them to tickle their fancy.
Another chemical we release during orgasm is phenetylamine, a natural amphetamine, which may help curb an appetite for junk food or even cigarettes (livestrong.com).
It even has therapeutic value. As cited in Better Health, it is also a popular treatment for sexual dysfunction and is useful for learning to orgasm (mostly women) or controlling premature ejaculation in men (betterhealth.vic.gov.au).
In fact, a big motivator to write this column is a friend who, up until recently, had never had an orgasm. Then I saw an inspiring movie called Shortbus (See it. Or else), which centers around a pre-orgasmic sex therapist. You’ll never guess what the climax of the movie is (ba-dum chh). Smugly enough, I have regularly had orgasms since I was a kid (or earlier?), so this is a bit out of my realm of “expertise.”
But I will refer those who want to know more to a website of 81-year old Ph.D sexologist Betty Dodson and sexologist Carlin Ross, who is nearly half a century Betty’s junior: dodsonandross.com. It’s like Talk Sex with Sue Johanson, but way sassier and even raunchier. They are a great resource for instructions for first time orgasm, current events, sexual empowerment and so much more.
Across the board for physical, emotional and mental health, masturbation is better than a pharmaceutical, which would have negative side effects. It is totally normal, natural, organic and waste free.
Natural is really the key word here. Even as infants during general body exploration we tend to masturbate. It is so natural that we do it freely and unashamedly as babes. But then as we approach childhood, all of a sudden it’s “Johnny, quit playing with yourself.” Why the shift? What is unnatural is the demonization or stigmatization of masturbation (say that one ten times fast.)
An example of the former is the demonization by old wives’ tales and religion-induced guilt of rubbing one out. Ever hear the one about growing warts after an auto-afternoon delight?
Stigmatization of masturbation seems to subtly permeate our culture. For example: the image of lonely guys jacking off or reading in the news about someone masturbating on the bus. And lest we forget Pink’s masterpiece “U + Ur Hand?”
Another stigmatized concept is masturbation among those of the female persuasion. What I noticed when I first got to college was how my guy friends would brag about how often they did it and girls were more likely to deny it or shy away from the topic. Obviously not all people are like this, but I must abashedly admit that I, Suzy Spongeworthy, did not even verbalize my participation in masturbating until a whole year and a half into college. Tsk tsk.
These false labels on an inherently good thing should not persist. We must overcome the hesitancy and embrace the raw power of ruwbbing one out!
And here’s best thing about masturbation: anyone can do it. It is an equal opportunity activity that is good for your body, your mind and your sexual performance. A rubdown a day keeps the doctors away. And readers, one last word to remember: Procrasturbation.
