The Happy Trail

Gettin’ down on the town: exploring options beyond the bedroom

A slight change of scenery can help add excitement to sex outside of the traditional bedroom space.

When engaging in bedroom activities, we generally  think of things going down in a bed in a bedroom. However, our tuition dollars are going to maintaining this beautiful campus and there are a variety of different ways to fully enjoy it.

It’s always great to add fresh air and a little scenery to your sexcapades. There is a treasure trove of places on a college campus to post up and hook up. Find a campus map and a red marker to search for potential sexy zones: XXX marks the spot.

Perhaps this column needs a preface. Even though something that’s technically wrong can feel oh so right, indecent exposure might be an awkward one to explain if it was on your police record.

I’d say start PG, feel it out, get some experience and then start clicking it up a notch at a time. It is not recommended to dive straight into doggy style on Todd Field, so start with making out. Perfectly legal and still hot. You can always move the show indoors.

The next step would probably be some under the clothes fondling. Wear some sweatpants for easy/subtle access and grab a blanket.

Now for the eternal question of “Where to?”

For your preliminary stint, I suggest somewhere indoors to allow for some mental transitioning for you and your partner.

The library or other buildings to which you have card access are examples. The general rule of libraries is the higher you go, the quieter (and more suitable for sexiness). Plus, what better than a little sexual healing as a study break?

Or, if you live in a dorm (or have the vagina [thanks, Betty White!] to sneak into one), laundry rooms will do quite nicely.

Then you can move outside to broaden your horizons. Maybe hit up wooded areas, especially in the spring with lots of shrubbery. Cavorting in a big bush (…the plant) is ideal cover, but watch for thorns or allergic reactions.

From there, get creative. Are you a sports fan? Hit up the bleachers or a desolate hallway in the Fieldhouse. The possibilities are endless.

Another big piece of advice for public hookups is to mind your timing.

In buildings, go at odd hours like dinner time. If you’re outside, maybe wait until the weekend late at night (or early morning). A little alcohol will make you less nervous, but your reaction time might be slowed or your judgment impaired.

Be respectful of and careful around security, cops, parents, little kids, prospies, etc. Your peers are hopefully more likely to be a) the ones to see you and b) cool about it.

I have never explored hooking up in public in terms of being in view of other people. Personally, having other people potentially or purposely seeing me in the throes doesn’t really appeal to me. If it turns you on, great! And also, good luck. May you never get caught and if you do, may it be worth it.

Though we just cracked open a fresh month and the weather is often cold and/or gross, it’s all the more reason to take advantage of those sparse sunny days.

Then again, the infamous dreariness makes for poor visibility… good cover for enjoying the great outdoors in a new way.