Best last-minute halloween costumes
The costume that sends a strong message about the importance of safe sex:
NAME: The broken condom*
HOW TO: Put a plastic bag over your head (The Trail is not responsible for any accidental suffocation that may occur) and cut a hole in it.
*(Warning: It is impossible to achieve a Halloween Hook-Up wearing this costume.)
The costume that comments on the horrors of daily existence as opposed to myth or fantasy:
NAME: Public transportation.
HOW TO: Turn a refrigerator box on its side and cut holes for windows. You are the driver of this Bus of Horrors. Knock cups from people’s hands, yelling “No open drinks on the bus!”
The costume that is disturbingly realistic:
HOW TO: Wear a Stadium High School sweatshirt and a fake, enthusiastic grin. “Hey guys! You go to Puget Sound? That’s such a cool campus! Mind if we crash your party and drink your beer? You don’t? Great!”