Opinions

Preventing disease is everyone’s responsibility

by Jaegar Doty On Sundays, I enjoy working at a daycare. Kids have the unique ability to somehow be both incredibly amusing and unbelievably frustrating. The children in this daycare are typically the former; however, oftentimes I find myself rocking one of the more temperamental children, a young boy dubbed “Baby JP” by the other kids. Typically I rock him until he calms and can return to sticking blocks in his mouth. When initially presented with this task, I was struck by the incredible vulnerability of a child this age....
Combat Zone

“The C*ck Talks” garners mixed reviews from campus audience

By PIETER VAN DEFERENS “My penis is a mountain, silent and majestic,” announced senior Steve Johnson.  “My penis is a shining sword, a mighty tool, a monument.” “My penis is angry!” rejoined sophomore Chris Haardschaft.  “It is purple and aching and my balls, my balls, my balls, blue and swollen, how they cry out for freedom and release!” Such were the priapic odes of Puget Sound’s inaugural performance of  “The C*ck Talks” Friday night in Club Rendezvous.  The show drew a mix of criticism and praise from campus audiences, who...
Combat Zone

SECURITY REPORT

The following incidents occurred on campus and were reported to Security Services between Nov. 23 and Nov. 28 •Two members of Campus Security, responding to a call, approached a campus-owned house on 12th and Alder that was believed to be occupied by a group known as “The Underground Christians,” a heavily-armed fundamentalist group that believed the apocalypse was imminent, following the relase of Adam Sandler’s latest romantic comedy.  Upon entering the house, the security guards discovered the bodies of all 57 members of the cult, victims of a mass suicide....
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